~Author's Note: This is about remembering someone special. Is actually about my Great Grandma and how I would always remember her. Enjoy! :)
My life is in your hands, what do you see?
A challenge, a decision, responsibility?
For every breath I take, depends on these moments.
My happiness, my comfort, my existence.
You do not judge me, you make me grin.
Great memories, great thoughts, all reside within.
The things we see every day, the things we feel,
The joy and confidence, it seems unreal.
When hours last forever, and minutes stand still.
I think about each dream, and think about each thrill.
Living each second, embracing time
More we spend together, more you are mine.
It is all in these moments, that will last forever.
No matter what; I will still remember.
I really love what you did with this piece. It is really expressive and descriptive.
ReplyDeleteI really like the voice in this poem. I think you should have included and authors note, and told us why you write it or how you got the idea. Also some lines rhymed and some didn't so I was a little confused.
ReplyDeleteI think this poem is much better than the one you wrote for your story. It could have been better because like Abby said, still sometimes you were rhyming sometimes you weren't. Although it is far better than the last one. Still I really liked this poem a lot and it shows what kind of voice you have. Good Job!
ReplyDeleteI was really impressed with this poem. You had really good word choice, and I liked the concept of the poem. What inspired you to write this?
ReplyDeleteI was amazed at how great this poem turned out. I always find it hard in poems to organize the syllables so that they sound good, but it is hard because everyone speaks then a little differently. This poem flowed really great and you organized your line lengths really well. I think that you should continue to write poetry, because I think that you are very good at it.
ReplyDeleteThis is a beautiful poem, and after hearing the inspiration, it even means more. I love the sentiment too. What a positive way to look at death! Well done.
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